Emotional Support Animal Evaluations - A simple, fast process that allows you to have your pet in "no-pets" housing as well as being able to travel with you in the cabin on airlines at no additional cost. Located in East Fort Lauderdale, we offer day and evening appointments for your convenience. Contact us today for an appointment!
Great article by Alice Park:
The Fountain of Youth May Be Closer Than You Ever Thought
Mark Zielinski knew he was onto something when his mice stopped sleeping. Normally, the animals woke and slept on a 12-hour cycle. When the lights were on in the lab, the mice were active. When it went dark on a timer, down they went. But Zielinski, who teaches psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, had recently tweaked their schedule to keep the mice up past their bedtime.
Zielinski and his colleagues would rustle the bedding in the mice's cages to keep them from dozing off when they started to display the telltale signs of sleepiness—drooping lids, sluggish walk, EEG readings showing their brain activity was waning. But Zielinski noticed that when the mice were left alone to slumber at will after the disruption, they didn't, or perhaps couldn't, fall asleep.
That the sleep-deprived rodents slept less than they normally would didn't really surprise Zielinski. The mice had a genetic mutation that he suspected was linked to sleep problems. More striking were the electrical brain readings showing that even when they did sleep, they weren't getting the deep, restorative kind of rest that doctors say matters most—not just to rodents but also to humans.
In the right conditions, researchers believe, the brain produces a signal that essentially tells the body's major systems—the heart, the lungs, the digestive system, the nervous system, even the muscles—that it's time to call it quits for the day. Zielinski's research has found that, just as with the mice with the mutation, it's likely that in some people with chronic sleep problems, that critical signal isn't firing.
Understanding what's behind some forms of insomnia, an aim of Zielinski's research, is a major step in learning how to fix it. That's a big deal in sleep research, because evidence linking quality rest to good health and longevity has never been more convincing.
Scientists are learning that shortchanging sleep can compromise nearly every major body system, from the brain to the heart to the immune system, making our inability—or unwillingness—to sleep enough one of the unhealthiest things we can do.
Studies of people whose sleep sessions are irregular or short show they are at higher risk of developing diseases that can lead to early death, including heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure and obesity. Poor sleep may have detrimental effects on the brain as well, increasing the risk of dementia, including Alzheimer's disease, as well as mood disorders like depression, posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and anxiety. And like smoking, a terrible diet and not exercising enough, poor sleep is now linked to an overall increased risk of premature death.
"I used to suggest that sleep is the third pillar of good health, along with diet and exercise," says Matthew Walker, a professor of neuroscience and psychology at the University of California, Berkeley. "But I don't agree with that anymore. Sleep is the single most effective thing you can do to reset your brain and body for health."
Despite the mounting evidence of its benefits, Americans are sleeping about two hours less each night than they did a century ago. Blame the technology-fueled 24/7 workplace, social media or the relentless news cycle, but about one-third of U.S. adults sleep less than the recommended seven hours daily, and 40% report feeling drowsy during the day, according to data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The problem begins early: only 15% to 30% of U.S. teens get the 8½ hours a night recommended for adolescents.
While life expectancy has been inching upward over the past century thanks to advances in medicine and technology, those gains could start to sag under the weight of our collective sleeplessness. Many people still dismiss sleep as something they can occasionally (or even regularly) skimp on, but the biological facts are clear: it is neither safe nor wise to take sleep lightly.
"To me, sleep is like the canary in the coal mine," says David Schnyer, a professor of psychology and neuroscience at the University of Texas, Austin. "Changes in sleep can create systemwide changes in the organism, and all of the stages of sleep affect the entire body and brain.”
That's why sleep deprivation is so strongly linked to disease and premature death. One recent study even showed that sleep deprivation in mice can cause death faster than starvation can. And yet doctors—those who talk to their patients about sleep in the first place, anyway—report that many people still aren't convinced that their nightly rest is a critical piece of the long-life puzzle. Health obsessives who would never touch a cigarette and pride themselves on avoiding junk food may also boast about how much they get done, and how little they sleep at night.
"Because we're asleep, we don't see the benefits of it," says Robert Stickgold, a well-known sleep researcher and an associate professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. "That's the disaster and tragedy of our current world.”
It's been that way for a long time. Benjamin Franklin famously quipped that "there will be sleeping enough in the grave," and today, sleep is still misperceived as one of the most duty-driven and unproductive parts of the day—the habit that gets in the way of life as opposed to the one most likely to extend it.
Perhaps that's because until very recently, scientists couldn't even agree on the evolutionary reason why animals need to sleep in the first place. But now they know that what happens during sleep, particularly in the brain, is critical to human well-being—not to mention a long life. That's why they also know that the cost of ignoring the latest science on sleep can be dear.
Spending a good third of the day oblivious to the world around you and, by extension, incapable of protecting yourself doesn't seem like a smart way for a species to stay alive. And yet every animal does it, leading scientists to accept that sleep must be nonnegotiable for some reason—and that we must need a certain amount of it to survive.
Following a rigorous, milestone study in 2002 of more than 1 million healthy men and women by the American Cancer Society, experts suggested that the magic amount of sleep for longevity was seven hours a night. People who slept that amount were most likely to still be alive at the end of the study's six years, compared with people who got either six hours or less, or eight hours or more, of sleep each night. To this day, that's typically the amount that doctors and public-health groups recommend for the average adult, though older people can probably get away with a little less sleep than that, and younger people need more.
Another even longer study, which followed more than 21,000 twins in Finland, found that people who were regularly sleeping less than seven hours daily were 21% to 26% more likely to die of any cause during the study's 22-year period than those who slept more than eight hours.
So clearly sleep has some real biological benefit. Could it just be that the brain and body need downtime to recuperate after the activity of the day? That was the most popular explanation for decades, until an inquisitive neuroscientist at the University of Rochester decided to look for the answer inside the brain itself. When she did, Dr. Maiken Nedergaard uncovered what many scientists now agree is sleep's primary evolutionary function: to clean out the brain, quite literally, of accumulating debris.
In 2014, Nedergaard first revealed that while the body appears to rest during sleep, a whole lot is happening inside the brain. Neurons pulse with electrical signals that wash over the brain in a rhythmic flow. The brain runs checks on itself to ensure that the balance of hormones, enzymes and proteins isn't too far off-kilter. All the while, brain cells contract, opening up the spaces between them so that fluid can wash out the toxic detritus that can cause all kinds of problems if it builds up.
"It's like a dishwasher that keeps flushing through to wash the dirt away," Nedergaard says.
Without that nightly wash cycle, dangerous toxins can damage healthy cells and interfere with their ability to communicate with one another. In the short term, that can impede memory formation and the ability to coherently compose our thoughts and regulate our emotions. Over time, the consequences can be more dire. Lack of sleep can lead to faster aging of brain cells, contributing to diseases like Alzheimer's, which is now the cause of death for 1 in 3 seniors.
Nedergaard's research, which was done in mice, prompted a crucial rethinking of not only the benefits of sleep but also its biological function. It turns out the brain and body are extremely active when we sleep—we're just not aware of most of what occurs while we do it.
"Sleep is not just a passive state but a fairly active state on the molecular level," says Dr. Allan Pack, director of the Center for Sleep and Circadian Neurobiology at the University of Pennsylvania. "During the day, the brain is using energy resources to fire neurons. At night, a switch turns on so the sleeping brain can take advantage of the metabolic downtime to do some cleaning up.”
The idea that sleep is a time of important biological activity, rather than a period when the body checks out, is transforming how doctors think about another important factor in longevity: mental health.
Scientists have long known that sleep is important for memory. But it turns out that during sleep, especially the cycles of deep dream sleep, the brain doesn't just revisit the events of a day in a more organized way. It also works on processing the emotions attached to these recollections. When a memory is filed away during sleep, it's also stripped of some of the powerful feelings—like fear, grief, anger or joy—that might have clouded the experiences in the heat of the moment.
It wouldn't be healthy, or efficient, to remember every event or experience in its full factual and emotional context. But separating the emotional aspects of a memory—the anger over an argument with your spouse, the frustration at the guy who cut you off in traffic, the dejection you felt after getting a curt email reply from your boss—from its objective parts allows you to recall the experience without reliving it. "We sleep to remember and we sleep to forget," says Walker, the UC Berkeley sleep scientist, of this coping mechanism. "I call it overnight therapy."
This type of processing takes time. It likely happens only during deep, quality sleep, and only over consistent nights of such sleep. That may explain why people who cut their sleep short or experience interrupted sleep may not fully disentangle the emotional baggage from their memories.
In those cases the memory, in its emotionally taxing entirety, continues to resurface every time the brain tries to sleep, in a vain effort to be properly processed. The brain tries to store the memory in a neutral way, but without deep sleep, there just isn't enough time for that triage.
Walker believes these aborted efforts may drive conditions like PTSD, which is well understood to be common among combat veterans but which may be more common among the general population than therapists and researchers previously thought.
"The more nights you sleep, the more soothing the influence of sleep on that memory," he says. "Sleep continues to work on those emotional memories and flatten them out after about a week. Now there's great evidence that PTSD is a disorder in which that process fails.”
Walker saw this effect firsthand when he showed a group of people a frightening video. He kept some of the people awake after the viewing and allowed the rest to sleep normally. Those who were not allowed to sleep properly were more likely to remember the negative aspects of the video than those who got enough sleep.
There's also strong support for the idea that insufficient sleep may be a trigger for, and not just a symptom of, a number of mental illnesses, including depression, bipolar disorder and even schizophrenia. Depriving people with bipolar disorder of sleep, for example, can launch a manic episode, while some people with depression report worsening symptoms when they aren't sleeping well.
Fully understanding the role sleep plays in mental illness is a rich area of future research. Already many doctors think consistent, high-quality sleep can have a direct bearing on the health of those with mental illness. "Anyone who suffers from moderate or significant mental-health concerns needs to be aware that sleep may be one of the most important things they can do," says Walker.
Stress, scientists also know, is one of the more potent accelerators of aging, and a body that's not sleeping enough looks similar to one that's stressed out—it's highly reactive to perceived threats, even when those threats don't pose any real risk. Biologically speaking, there's virtually no difference in the way a body reacts to a startling noise in the middle of the night, a rabid raccoon or a stressful work deadline: in all cases, fight-or-flight mode is triggered, blood pressure spikes, breathing gets shallow, and the heart starts to race. That's what happens to a body on no sleep too.
Those stress reactions can be useful, of course: they help you respond more readily to an actual physical threat. But that's not usually what's going on. And staying in an alert mode can trigger a number of unhealthy conditions, the most damaging of which is inflammation.
Inflammation is the body's natural defense system against injury or invading microbes like bacteria and viruses. It's why your toe turns red and throbs when you stub it or when it's infected: white blood cells rush to the area in order to protect it for the short time it's needed to help you get better. But inflammation can also become chronic, and that's when the real trouble starts.
Chronic inflammation, doctors now know, is a leading driver of many diseases, including some cancers, cognitive decline, heart disease, Type 2 diabetes—even chronic pain. And one of the main drivers of chronic inflammation is, of course, not sleeping enough.
Getting a decent night's sleep, then, is good advice for all of us. Americans spent an estimated $41 billion on sleeping pills and other sleep aids in 2015; no matter how much we may boast about our stamina, we know intuitively that we need sleep, even if we don't always know why.
But scientists do. That's why experts are insisting, with increasing frequency and noise, that sleep be a priority—as important or more than what you eat and how much you exercise. We wouldn't dream of skipping meals on a regular basis, so why skimp on sleep?
There's still much about sleep that mystifies scientists—particularly about what goes wrong for so many of us, night after night. But as they chip away at the underlying causes of sleeplessness, they get ever closer to a cure. Harvard's Zielinski, for one, is hopeful that they will eventually find a way to help more people sleep better every night.
When he gave his sleepless mice a drug to fix the mutation that was interfering with their sleep in the first place, they began to slumber anew.
A great article written by MAIA SZALAVITZ of the New York Times:
The 4 Traits That Put Kids at Risk for Addiction
Drug education is the only part of the middle school curriculum I remember — perhaps because it backfired so spectacularly. Before reaching today’s legal drinking age, I was shooting cocaine and heroin.
I’ve since recovered from my addiction, and researchers now are trying to develop innovative prevention programs to help children at risk take a different road than I did.
Developing a public antidrug program that really works has not been easy. Many of us grew up with antidrug programs like D.A.R.E. or the Nancy Reagan-inspired antidrug campaign “Just Say No.” But research shows those programs and others like them that depend on education and scare tactics were largely ineffective and did little to curb drug use by children at highest risk.
But now a new antidrug program tested in Europe, Australia and Canada is showing promise. Called Preventure, the program, developed by Patricia Conrod, a professor of psychiatry at the University of Montreal, recognizes how a child’s temperament drives his or her risk for drug use — and that different traits create different pathways to addiction. Early trials show that personality testing can identify 90 percent of the highest risk children, targeting risky traits before they cause problems.
Recognizing that most teenagers who try alcohol, cocaine, opioids or methamphetamine do not become addicted, they focus on what’s different about the minority who do.
The traits that put kids at the highest risk for addiction aren’t all what you might expect. In my case, I seemed an unlikely candidate for addiction. I excelled academically, behaved well in class and participated in numerous extracurricular activities.
Inside, though, I was suffering from loneliness, anxiety and sensory overload. The same traits that made me “gifted” in academics left me clueless with people.
That’s why, when my health teacher said that peer pressure could push you to take drugs, what I heard instead was: “Drugs will make you cool.” As someone who felt like an outcast, this made psychoactive substances catnip.
Preventure’s personality testing programs go deeper. They focus on four risky traits: sensation-seeking, impulsiveness, anxiety sensitivity and hopelessness.
Importantly, most at-risk kids can be spotted early. For example, in preschool I was given a diagnosis of attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (A.D.H.D.), which increases illegal drug addiction risk by a factor of three. My difficulty regulating emotions and oversensitivity attracted bullies. Then, isolation led to despair.
A child who begins using drugs out of a sense of hopelessness — like me, for instance — has a quite different goal than one who seeks thrills.
Three of the four personality traits identified by Preventure are linked to mental health issues, a critical risk factor for addiction. Impulsiveness, for instance, is common among people with A.D.H.D., while hopelessness is often a precursor to depression. Anxiety sensitivity, which means being overly aware and frightened of physical signs of anxiety, is linked to panic disorder.
While sensation-seeking is not connected to other diagnoses, it raises addiction risk for the obvious reason that people drawn to intense experience will probably like drugs.
Preventure starts with an intensive two- to three-day training for teachers, who are given a crash course in therapy techniques proven to fight psychological problems. The idea is to prevent people with outlying personalities from becoming entrenched in disordered thinking that can lead to a diagnosis, or, in the case of sensation-seeking, to dangerous behavior.
When the school year starts, middle schoolers take a personality test to identify the outliers. Months later, two 90-minute workshops — framed as a way to channel your personality toward success — are offered to the whole school, with only a limited number of slots. Overwhelmingly, most students sign up, Dr. Conrod says.
Although selection appears random, only those with extreme scores on the test — which has been shown to pick up 90 percent of those at risk — actually get to attend. They are given the workshop targeted to their most troublesome trait.
But the reason for selection is not initially disclosed. If students ask, they are given honest information; however, most do not and they typically report finding the workshops relevant and useful.
“There’s no labeling,” Dr. Conrod explains. This reduces the chances that kids will make a label like “high risk” into a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The workshops teach students cognitive behavioral techniques to address specific emotional and behavioral problems and encourage them to use these tools.
Preventure has been tested in eight randomized trials in Britain, Australia, the Netherlands and Canada, which found reductions in binge drinking, frequent drug use and alcohol-related problems.
A 2013 study published in JAMA Psychiatry included over 2,600 13- and 14-year-olds in 21 British schools, half of whom were randomized to the program. Overall, Preventure cut drinking in selected schools by 29 percent — even among those who didn’t attend workshops. Among the high-risk kids who did attend, binge drinking fell by 43 percent.
Dr. Conrod says that Preventure probably affected non-participants by reducing peer pressure from high-risk students. She also suspects that the teacher training made instructors more empathetic to high-risk students, which can increase school connection, a known factor in cutting drug use.
Studies in 2009 and in 2013 also showed that Preventure reduced symptoms of depression, panic attacks and impulsive behavior. For kids with personality traits that put them at risk, learning how to manage traits that make us different and often difficult could change a trajectory that can lead to tragedy.
Maia Szalavitz is the author of “Unbroken Brain: A Revolutionary New Way of Understanding Addiction.”
1. Turn off the TV news. Instead, light candles and put on music.
2. Notice even the smallest of your daily accomplishments instead of what you DIDN’T get done. Keep a “success list!”
3. Remember that we get what we focus on in life. Focusing on good points in yourself and others will bring MORE of them.
4. Take a “senses walk” for 20 minutes, 4 times a week. Notice the breath in your lungs, the smell of the air, the change of the seasons. Outdoor light and exercise both stimulate serotonin production, lifting mood.
5. Take a few minutes daily to “hibernate.” Close your door, remove your shoes, dim the lights, and focus on what makes you happy.
6. Breathe in to the slow count of four. Hold it four slow counts. Release in four slow counts. Repeat until you feel the muscles relax all over!
7. Stay aware of your thoughts.
8. Don’t take on another person’s bad mood. Guard yourself, removing yourself from their company if necessary.
9. Find freedom by letting go of criticizing and complaining about yourself or someone else.
10. If you need to make changes, act NOW. Don’t put off health or happiness!
Tips for Coping with Panic Attacks
Always begin with a visit to your doctor or health care provider to ensure that there is not an underlying medical cause to your symptoms. Don’t self-diagnose. Panic symptoms include:
- Shortness of breath
- Tightness in the chest
- Rapid heartbeat
- Inability to relax*
*(NOTE): since these can be symptoms of other medical emergencies, DON’T self-diagnose. Seek emergency medical care if this is the first time you’ve experienced this)
What Can I Do To Cope?
- RATE the panic on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 meaning not bad at all, up to 10 meaning, call an ambulance! Anything we can MEASURE we can start to control.
- ACCEPT, don’t fight. Fighting increases the bodily symptoms.
- ASK yourself: what’s the worst that could happen here? How would I handle it?
- BREATHE normally and naturally. Pay attention to your breath.
- FOCUS on an object in the room. See it, describe it to yourself. This helps orient you in the present moment reality.
- TIME the attack (measuring again). Note how little time it actually lasts.
- NOTICE if the attacks are happening in a certain location or at a certain time (“cued” attacks.) When it passes, get out a piece of paper and write about that place or time. BE A SCIENTIST about your panic—objective, measuring, curious.
- TAKE your writings to your counselor to further explore the causes of the panic.
- REMEMBER that overcoming panic is not a matter of willpower. It is a malfunction of brain chemistry which can be helped by cognitive-behavioral therapy and/or medication. Medication takes away the SYMPTOM but not the CAUSE. Therapy helps get to the root of the problem.
Remember that a panic attack won’t hurt your physically. Although it’s very uncomfortable, your body will continue to breathe and function through it. And we are here to help - don’t hesitate to contact us.
One person helping the other in time of need is an age-old tradition. People have been needing the helpers in a myriad of situations. From repair work to curing illness, helpers have been helping mankind since long ago. The mental health helper was like an individual particularly blessed or gifted in his or her ability to assist others through trying times. People with mental illness also need someone that can help them to get back to a healthy and fulfilling life. This is where psychotherapy comes in.
Psychotherapy is used for treating many different issues and problems like emotional crises, depression, anxiety, family disputes, marital problems etc. The types of psychotherapy include cognitive therapy, behavior therapy, family therapy, interpersonal therapy, expressive therapy, hypnotherapy and others.
Psychotherapy is performed either in a group or for individuals. In both the cases, it is usually of tremendous benefit. Here are some benefits of psychotherapy:
- Psychotherapy enables you to tackle your issues either at work or home to maintain a healthy connection with the people around you.
- When a person suffers depression, the family suffers too and psychotherapy helps them to be strong in these times and support the patient.
- Psychotherapy enables you to cope with depression more effectively and face the world looking in their eyes without any hesitation.
- It enables you to identify your weak points and unhealthy behaviors and change them with time.
- You can regain confidence in your personality and quite possibly you will not suffer depression and anxiety again.
- Psychotherapy helps to develop skills to improve relationships.
- It helps improve interpersonal skills.
- It helps you to overcome certain problems, like eating disorder, depression, compulsive habits.
- Psychotherapy enables you to manage personal emotions effectively.
These are only some of the benefits of psychotherapy. A psychotherapist can enable you to get back to life and live in a normal way without fear. Skillful therapists are problem-solvers in the domain of emotions and relationships. This is a very powerful domain, but it is so ever present that it is often in the background of awareness, like the blue sky or dark night. The sufferer starts getting some hope and sees light required to get back to normal.
Patients with depression and anxiety feel that they are left alone in this world. With psychotherapy, they realize that someone is there to listen to them. They feel that someone is listening what they are saying with patience and supporting them. Psychotherapy helps people by helping them to understand the behavior and emotions that contribute to their issues and how to deal with them. Thus, helping them to come out of the stress and mental blocks caused by illness, death of a relative or loved one, loss of a job or marital problem. The most important aspect is to help them learn techniques to cope with problems.
This is a great article about emotional neglect from childhood by Dhyan Summers, MA, LMFT:
How to Recognize and Overcome Childhood Emotional Neglect
Because it’s mostly silent and invisible, childhood emotional neglect is largely an overlooked phenomenon in psychology. Unlike physical neglect or abuse, where there are signs such as bruises or children coming to school underfed, emotional neglect is difficult to identify as there are frequently no observable signs. More importantly, emotional neglect is generally unrecognized by the child until symptoms begin to appear in adulthood.
Emotional neglect can take many forms, from a parent having unrealistically high expectations or not listening attentively, to invalidating a child’s emotional experiences to the point he or she begins to feel self-doubt. When a parent is not emotionally attuned to a child, there is no mirror held up, no positive reflection being shared with the child. Developing a positive sense of self, then, becomes more challenging for the child.
Symptoms of Emotional Neglect
Symptoms of childhood emotional neglect that show up in adults may include (but are not limited to):
- “Numbing out” or being cut off from one’s feelings
- Feeling like there’s something missing, but not being sure what it is
- Feeling hollow inside
- Being easily overwhelmed or discouraged
- Low self-esteem
- Pronounced sensitivity to rejection
- Lack of clarity regarding others’ expectations and your own expectations for yourself
- While having these symptoms doesn’t necessarily mean you were emotionally neglected, if you identify with more than one symptom, it may be worthwhile to talk with a therapist about the possibility.
What Kinds of Parents Tend to Emotionally Neglect Their Children?
First, let me say most parents are well-intentioned and well-meaning and generally do the best they can. Some may have experienced emotional neglect themselves as children, and therefore may not have a lot to give emotionally. However, there are some parenting styles and characteristics that lend themselves to emotional neglect.
Authoritarian parents want their children to follow the rules, and have little time or inclination for listening to a child’s feelings and needs. As adults, children raised by an authoritative parent may either rebel against authority or perhaps become submissive.
Permissive parents have a laissez-faire attitude about child rearing and may let children pretty much fend for themselves. Children raised by permissive parents may have a tough time setting boundaries and limits for themselves in adulthood.
Parents with narcissistic qualities feel the world revolves around them. It’s typically all about the parent’s needs instead of the child’s. As adults, these children may have difficulty identifying their needs and ensuring that they’re met. They may even feel that they don’t deserve to have their needs met.
Perfectionistic parents tend to believe their children can always do more or better. These are the parents who may complain when a child brings home a report card with all A’s and one B. Children of such parents may grow up to be perfectionists, and set unrealistically high expectations for themselves, resulting in anxiety around feelings of never being good enough.
Absent parents can be removed from a child’s life for a variety of reasons, such as death, illness, divorce, working long hours, or frequent travel for work. Children of absent parents end up raising themselves to a large extent, and if they are the oldest child may also raise their younger siblings. These children tend to be overly responsible, which may carry over to adult life. As children, they seem like little adults, overburdened with worry about their families.
Tips for Recovering from Emotional Neglect
So what can you do if you think you may have been emotionally neglected as a child? Here are some tips:
1. Learn to be aware of positive and negative emotions when you’re experiencing them.
If you’ve spent your adult life being disconnected from your feelings, the first step is to learn to identify positive and negative emotion. It’s important to acknowledge just good and uncomfortable feelings to begin with.
Once you have that down, you can focus on noting subtler nuances of feelings. You may not even have words for how you feel, which is perfectly normal if you didn’t grow up in a home where people talked about their feelings.
2. Identify your needs, and take steps to meet them.
Many adults who experienced emotional neglect as children are often unaware of what they need and typically don’t feel deserving of getting their needs met. Develop your emotional vocabulary by researching emotions and needs online or at the library. Once you know what you need, it’s time to take action.
3. If you believe you don’t deserve to have your needs met, acknowledge the belief and see it as just that—a belief, not a fact.
It can be helpful to begin to deconstruct old beliefs you’ve held for a long time that may no longer hold true. Like everyone else on the planet, you have emotional needs that you deserve to have met, no matter what you experienced in childhood.
4. Be gentle with and take good care of yourself, starting with small steps.
Adults who experienced emotional neglect as children often have difficulty with self-care. Unaware of their feelings and needs, they frequently don’t know where to start. Try treating yourself with the same care and gentleness you would give a child who wasn’t able to take care of themselves. Be tender and compassionate with yourself, especially if you tend to be self-critical or judgmental.
And remember: Rome wasn’t built in a day! This is a process. When you skin your knee, you need to clean out the wound and expose it to the light of day; the same holds true for emotional wounds. Dare to bring the wound out of hiding, give it some light and air, and you’ll be on the road to healing.
A great article from the NY Times on the connection between exercise and relief from depression:
How Exercise Might Keep Depression at Bay
By GRETCHEN REYNOLDS NOV. 16, 2016
Exercise may be an effective treatment for depression and might even help prevent us from becoming depressed in the first place, according to three timely new studies. The studies pool outcomes from past research involving more than a million men and women and, taken together, strongly suggest that regular exercise alters our bodies and brains in ways that make us resistant to despair.
Scientists have long questioned whether and how physical activity affects mental health. While we know that exercise alters the body, how physical activity affects moods and emotions is less well understood.
Past studies have sometimes muddied rather than clarified the body and mind connections. Some randomized controlled trials have found that exercise programs, often involving walking, ease symptoms in people with major depression.
But many of these studies have been relatively small in scale or had other scientific deficiencies. A major 2013 review of studies related to exercise and depression concluded that, based on the evidence then available, it was impossible to say whether exercise improved the condition. Other past reviews similarly have questioned whether the evidence was strong enough to say that exercise could stave off depression.
A group of global public-health researchers, however, suspected that newer studies and a more rigorous review of the statistical evidence might bolster the case for exercise as a treatment of and block against depression.
So for the new analyses, they first gathered all of the most recent and best-designed studies about depression and exercise.
Then, for perhaps the most innovative of the new studies, which was published last month in Preventive Medicine, they focused on whether exercise could help to prevent someone from developing depression.
The scientists knew that many past studies of that topic had relied on people providing reports about how much they had exercised. We human beings tend to be notoriously unreliable in our memories of past workouts, though.
So the researchers decided to use only past studies that had objectively measured participants’ aerobic fitness, which will rise or fall depending on whether and how much someone exercises. Participants’ mental health also had to have been determined with standard testing at the start and finish of the studies, and the follow-up time needed to have been at least a year and preferably longer.
Ultimately, the researchers found several large-scale past studies that met their criteria. Together, they contained data on more than 1,140,000 adult men and women.
Among these million-plus people, the links between fitness and mental health turned out to be considerable. When the researchers divided the group into thirds, based on how aerobically fit they were, those men and women with the lowest fitness were about 75 percent more likely to have been given diagnoses of depression than the people with the greatest fitness. The men and women in the middle third were almost 25 percent more likely to develop depression than those who were the most fit.
In a separate study (some of the scientists were involved in each of the reviews), researchers looked at whether exercise might be useful as a treatment for depression. In that analysis, which was published in June in the Journal of Psychiatric Research, they pooled data from 25 past studies in which people with clinically diagnosed depression began some type of exercise program. Each study had to include a control group that did not exercise and be otherwise methodologically sophisticated.
The pooled results persuasively showed that exercise, especially if it is moderately strenuous, such as brisk walking or jogging, and supervised, so that people complete the entire program, has a “large and significant effect” against depression, the authors wrote. People’s mental health tended to demonstrably improve if they were physically active.
The final review offers some hints about why. Published in February in Neuroscience and Biobehavioral Reviews, it took on the difficult issue of what happens within our bodies during and after exercise that might affect and improve our moods. The researchers analyzed 20 past studies in which scientists had obtained blood samples from people with major depression before and after they had exercised. The samples on the whole indicated that exercise significantly reduced various markers of inflammation and increased levels of a number of different hormones and other biochemicals that are thought to contribute to brain health.
But the researchers also caution that most of the physiological studies they reviewed were too small and short-term to allow for firm conclusions about how exercise might change the brain to help fight off gloom.
Still, the three reviews together make a sturdy case for exercise as a means to bolster mental as well as physical health, said Felipe Barreto Schuch, an exercise scientist at the Centro Universitário La Salle in Canoas, Brazil, who, with Brendon Stubbs, a professor at King’s College in London, was a primary author on all of the reviews.
Many more experiments are still needed to determine the ideal amounts and types of exercise that might help both to prevent and treat depression, Dr. Schuch said.
But he encouraged anyone feeling overwhelmed by recent events, or just by life, to go for a run or a bike ride. “The main message” of his and his colleagues’ reviews, he said, “is that people need to be active to improve their mental health.”
Maesk Group Counseling provides Emotional Support Animal (ESA) evaluations. It is well documented through research that pets provide benefit to people suffering from anxiety, depression, PTSD, insomnia and many other conditions. Having an ESA prescription letter allows you to have your pet in no-pets housing, and allows you to travel with your pet in the cabin on airlines at no additional cost.
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